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At this stage of menopause, empty nests, ageing (not so) beautifully & maddening hormones, where do you buy that extra dose of love in this (HOT, pun intended) cuppa of life. Who do you reach out to for this life-saving vaccine that can make or break your sanity as we come close to being fiftylicious?
As the big fifty looms closer, you see your life map changing – ageing parents, empty nests, looming retirement. The boundaries that define your identity, begin to blur. From being a parent, a caregiver, a partner for over two decades, suddenly a whole new picture emerges. From having a sudden identity crisis to feeling lost or being excited to avail this opportunity, it is a new uncharted journey that you need to begin.

For me, it is a lingering feeling that the life I am living right now is not me. A little me but not totally me. I find myself going back and thinking about who I was when I started this journey because the last 25 years led to an ‘evolved me’ that is unrecognisable. From being a child to parent, student to teacher, mentee to mentor, from taking in the lessons to handing them out, life comes full circle. And now my fast tick-tocking clock wants more. More than just existing during that time in between family, work, life and death.

How do you reinvent yourself and come up with a 2.0 new avatar of yourself after five decades of being you? How do you learn to put yourself in the front seat when all your life you have been taking the backseat? How do you find your soul’s purpose, in this second half of your life?

I began engaging in conversations with myself. When I asked myself, “What is it that you want to do?” I found myself at a loss for an answer. I felt utterly clueless. There was no passion, no goal, no sense of accomplishment, and no identity. It was as if I had lost myself along the way. I no longer recognized who I was, what I desired, or what brought me joy.
Armed with pen and paper, I began the process of self-analysis. I would keep throwing prompts to my inner self. The responses that emerged were swift, hurtful, vicious, and painful, yet also deeply cathartic. No matter how challenging it was, I committed everything to paper. I engaged in debates, counterarguments, and self-counselling sessions. Drawing upon my experience as a Design Thinking trainer, I delved into the 5W’s to analyze the problem, created mind maps to examine different aspects, and expressed my thoughts through poetry and prose. I used these tools and time to embark on a journey of healing.
This is how Free Fifties my first book came into being—a testament to my journey of self-reflection, self-healing, self-discovery, and self-acceptance. It is not just my personal journey; it represents the journey of every woman. It was hard work—a year-long process of unlearning many things and discovering how to prioritize myself and set myself FREE.
And I must say it’s liberating….
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